What Happens When You “Flip Your Lid”?
A visual explanation on the brains functional capacity when we lose control of our big emotions.
By Kaitlyn H. BSc Psychology
Have you ever heard of the statement “flipping your lid”? Well, there is a reason this term is used, and it has to do with what happens to the physiology of our brains when we lose control of our temper.
If we model our brains using our hand, we can identify different parts of the brain and what it looks like when each part is engaged. By making a fist with our thumb tucked in we can see what our brains look like when our thinking brain is engaged. Our four fingers that are folded over our thumb is our prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex carries our executive functioning skills, being our working memory, cognitive flexibility, and our emotional regulation. These are important in the thinking brain, as it helps us make wise decisions, problem solve, create goals and plans, and control our temper. This is what our brain would look like when we are calm and in control of our emotions.
Our thumb that hides underneath our prefrontal cortex represents our amygdala, which can be thought of as our feeling brain. The amygdala is like our guard that wants to keep us safe in times of danger. This is where we feel our emotions, big or small, and it tells our bodies when to fight, flight or freeze in the sense of danger.
Lastly, the palm of our hand that lies beneath the prefrontal cortex and the amygdala is called the hippocampus. This is our memory brain that helps us remember old and new memories and helps us learn. This is the part of the brain that can also pull from past experiences to help us decide what to do when faced with an obstacle.
Photo by Andre Hunter on unsplash.com
When we become angry, sad, worried or upset, our amygdala senses danger and prepares our body to fight, flight or freeze. When our feeling brain becomes too much for our thinking brain to control and keep calm, that is when we ‘flip the lid”. The prefrontal cortex is “flipped” up and is no longer engaged, and your amygdala or feeling brain, takes control. At this time, the brains capacity to use our executive functioning skills to manage our emotion is no longer available to us to make rational decisions. The hippocampus, or memory brain, also becomes compromised, and we are unable to use our memories to decide what to do next. Our brain becomes completely controlled by our emotions and we lose our temper, and we start to act and say things before thinking about them.
“Flipping the lid” is normal for everyone. Sometimes it can be hard to stay calm in some situations we find ourselves in, especially when its new and we have no prior experience on how to deal with it. The good news is, even when we feel unable to control our emotions in the face of real or perceived danger, we can re-engage our thinking brain and our memory brain to help us problem solve and use the tools we do have to make rational decisions. We can do this through breathing techniques, sensory techniques, or other mindfulness techniques to help us calm our nervous system and encourage us to use our thinking brain.
Sometimes, our emotions can become so strong that these techniques might not work. In these times, removing ourselves from the real or perceived danger might be the best thing to do, and finding a safe space where we can calm ourselves down can be helpful before we return to address the problem we are facing.
Photo by Katerina May on unsplash.com
We are all human and we are not perfect. It is inevitable that we will “flip our lids” at one point or another. How we deal with these big emotions that we face can help prepare us and teach us how to tackle tough situations in the future and become more resilient to stress later on. When we know how to calm ourselves down, it can also be a model for others, especially children, as we show them how to regulate emotions in a healthy way. Finding the technique that works for you will be different from others, so try some out when you feel those big emotions are starting to take over. This may take time to recognize but remember that it is okay to make mistakes. That is how we learn!
If you are interested in learning some mindfulness techniques, Building Brains Together provides many ways to calm the nervous system and handle difficult emotions: https://www.buildingbrains.ca/mindful-moments
References:
Ability Options (2022). “Flipping the Lid – What really happens when we lose control of our emotions?”. Retrieved from https://abilityoptions.org.au/flipping-the-lid/
Siegel, Dan (2012). “Flipping Your Lid: A Scientific Explanation”. Found on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0T_2NNoC68
The Responsive Counselor (2021). Teaching Kids About Flipping Their Lids. Retrieved from https://theresponsivecounselor.com/2021/06/teaching-kids-about-flipping-their-lids.html
For a more kid friendly explanations, visit: https://theresponsivecounselor.com/2021/06/teaching-kids-about-flipping-their-lids.html